A Little Perspective

One day recently at work I was explaining to a co-worker some of the reasons why I don’t get angry while I’m there. I finished my sermon with “So basically, at two dollars and some change an hour, it isn’t worth it for me to get all bent out of shape.” Her response to my many excellent points was this: “you have a really good perspective.” Perspective. What does that word mean anymore? It’s easy for one to lose their perspective in a world where they can buy and sell items with someone in Moscow (or any other spot on earth). I wonder; if I really had perspective, shouldn’t I just come across a lot of money (probably “illegally”) and spend my very limited time on this speck, hurling through an infinite universe, having as much fun as I can. I should travel across the globe (probably “robbing” some banks along the way) and experience as much as I can during this galactic blink. Time is so fleeting, and I’m wasting it scratching out a meager paycheck. I could be sipping martinis under the Eiffel Tower while waiting for a flight to Australia, to try a little koala wrestling. Koala wrestling is just one of the millions upon millions of things I have not yet done during this cosmic snap of the fingers. Of course, I couldn’t let the pursuit of multiple law enforcement agencies get me down, as I venture to make the most of my time. They probably wouldn’t understand anyway. I would have to leave them notes that say “but the sun will burn out in 15 billion years, there is no time” on the pillows of the motel rooms I stayed in… perhaps other notes that say “earth is only 4 billion years old, far too early to judge my actions”. Hopefully, I would be able to avoid capture long enough to leave many such notes and they will start to see things from my perspective. At last, when they stop referring to my journey as a “crime spree”, I know I’ll be on easy street. “Finally”, I would say “looks like they are starting to see my point of view”. Me, my loot, “forged” documents, and Jenna Fischer (did I mention that she’d come with me?) would then be able to experience as much as possible during this plenum blip, so long as we keep a low profile.